A Prodigal's Path

Getting to “Yes” (part 3)

We all experience and deal with a number of hindrances in inviting our friends and family to worship and church events. None of them maybe more paralyzing than the fear or feeling of rejection. One of the first things I was taught in sales was that "No" and "Yes" are mathematical probabilities. It was something to the effect that you'll get 7 "No" responses for every "Yes". I have no idea if that's true but it has always helped me get on with my asking . . . somewhere out there is a "Yes".

Gracefully Getting Past "No". The reality of asking is that we must be prepared for disappointment and rejection. It happens. It's natural. And it happens regardless of whom we are, how old we are, and despite how influential we might be. But the stakes are higher in our endeavor and mission as the Church and the implication of "No" is much more weighty, eternal, and heart-wrenching than is being rejected by mom in the candy isle of the check-out line.

If there is a parallel message to be found in the Gospels then Jesus may be delivering the "Gracefully Getting Past No" message to the disciples here:

"Brother will deliver brother over to death, and the father his child, and children will rise against parents and have them put to death, and you will be hated by all for my name's sake." ~ Jesus (Matthew 10:21-22 ESV)

Right after Jesus tells them that when they are rejected in one town to move on to the next (v 23), followed by this:

"Fear not, therefore; you are of more value than many sparrows. So everyone who acknowledges me before men, I also will acknowledge before my Father who is in heaven," ~ Jesus (Matthew 10:31-32 ESV)

Matthew 10 concludes with Jesus asking us to take on the smallest of tasks in His name and act, and ask, on His behalf.

"And whoever gives one of these little ones even a cup of cold water because he is a disciple, truly, I say to you, he will by no means lose his reward." ~ Jesus (Matthew 10:42 ESV)

 

How to Gracefully Getting Past "No" may best be answered by paraphrasing Jesus' instructions to the twelve. He, Christ, never promised us that following Him would be easy. He knows, and asks, that we face challenges. But just as He did with the twelve, the words of Matthew remind us of these truths:

We will face rejection . . . but only if we ask (v 21-23)

When rejection comes accept it and move on (v23)

Don't be afraid . . . asking is worth it (v 31-32)

We're acting for Him . . . and asking on His behalf. (v42)

In other words . . . the rejection, and hopeful acceptance, is not about us,

It's all about Him. It always is.

 

 

Considering “Old Couches” - The Accidental Part 3

One of Northridge Church's most respected and eldest members, Jack Robson, called me this morning saying he had read my post "Considering Couches Part 1". I immediately thought "Whoops . . . " After all it wasn't my birthday, or our anniversary.

First, he told me that if John MacArthur can write books that I very well could too. I was speechless and got that warm tearful feeling that guys aren't supposed to have. While that may be an aspiration in my future, I don't believe I yet possess the contextual or spiritual depth to pull off such a project.

Second, he told me he had called Lucy Parsons and read my article to her. I held my breath and waited for the report of her response. She liked it too. I could relax and I let out that deep anxious breath I'd been holding in.

Jack then began to tell me about Phil Parson's wood shop behind the house. He told me about how over the years Phil would spend hours in his shop using old, trusted, and classic hand tools to craft, chisel, and shape wood into art. Sure he could use the "new" tools. But the old tools worked better and required long lost skills. Skills lost because of the advent of "new tools". But why pound a nail with a hammer when you can shoot a nail with a gun? I quickly began to realize this wasn't a story about tools. It was a story about the need for tried and true craftsmanship that is carefully handed down from one learned generation to new and learning generation.

Jack is right. Some things can only be handled and handed down by skilled hands and sharply honed hearts. We chatted away about balanced churches and we shared our ideas about two major points.

First, a church needs to be multi-generational to be in balance. I need Jack, June, Phil, Lucy, and all the others that make up the generation that can answer the questions I have. I need their footprints to follow on the path I now tread.

Second is that a church needs youth in order to have life and longevity. Someone needs to be there to be handed the torch before the lights go out and the doors locked.

As much as I've written about the need for objective change, I so often love, and need, the aged and familiar tap on the shoulder to remind me I'm being watched, loved, and guided by some really smart people who have stood where I now stand long before I ever walked this earth. Like a son, I need to know patriarchs like Jack are carefully watching and are there to guide me with sage biblical wisdom.

A couple quick thoughts on my blogging; If I've made people think, question, and challenge their ideas, and my ideas, about how church is done then I think the process is a success. It means we are taking a closer look at what we do and why we do it. And when I am writing about The Church I am pondering The Church at large. I'm speaking about all churches everywhere regardless of what name may be on their sign. "Considering Old Couches Part 1" & "Considering Old Couches Part 2" are both of the "church at large" genre.

Being a member of Northridge has been a unbelievably rewarding experience. I've never imagined being part of such a self-aware, self-conscious, Church whose genuine love and concern for the application of the Great Commission drive it to consistently confront itself for the concern of others.

Church Shopping 101

As previously mentioned I had taken a 20 year vacation from Church and worship. After being brought to my knees in a few areas of my life I decided it might be worthwhile to start fresh and try Christianity one more time. After days of discussion Lori and I decided to go "Church Shopping." It was 2003 and here's how that went:

There was a time when people still read newspapers and we tore out the weekly published list of "Local Churches." Being a big fan of the "Red Marker Treatment" I took my felt tip and crossed off any church that had the name "Fellowship" or "Community in it.  I did four years hard time in a Catholic High School and I didn't want that either so the big red "X" to them too.

From there I sorted them on how far from home they were. I'm a busy guy and travel time is wasted time. Next came the rankings of how interested I was based on their name and anything I might know about them from driving by on occasion or knowing someone who might go there.

Sunday, by Sunday, we piled into the truck, headed down the street. We timed our appearances just right. Too early and you might get caught in that awkward silence that occurs while waiting for everyone else. Too late and the "good seats" towards the back left side would be gone. It was best to sneak in with the crowd. Once safely inside the critiquing began. No. That's not true. Critiquing began with the newspaper.

I made mental notes of how everything looked, felt, and smelled. I would search for familiar items, or anyone I might know, want to know, or anyone acting out of sorts that I didn't want to know. My "weirdness" radar was highly active and waiting to detect any instance of strangeness or cult-like activity. I would read the church bulletin from cover to cover to see what was of interest not only to me, but to that church. Like a film critc I evaluated everything about the "production". Did things make sense in terms of how things happened, when they happened, and why they happened? We're people friendly, inviting, helpful, or was I left to piece this all together on my own?

The BIG questions to be answered was; "Were we comfortable?"

"The Show" starterd and music was the big one in terms of variance. We had choirs, robes, no robes, bells, organs, HUGE organs, books, no books, guitars, never any drums, good music, and not so good music. It's subjective I know, but sometimes I would just grit my teeth and think to myself "Oh No . . . not that thing again!"

There was the "seat count." Was this church empty, or full?  Was at it was it young, or old? Were there kids here and how many, what ages, etc. What was Sunday School like and did my kids have a good time? What did they learn and what were they bringing home? A coloring book page with a story about Jesus "Good" or some craft project that was supposed to be a gift for mommy "Nice, but Not So Good."

We experienced some interesting worship services that ran the gamut from very predictable to very strange. At times I would sit in a service and think to myself "I don't get it." Or "what's that all about?" Kneeling I never understood, or the sign of the cross thing before prayer, or how people remember what to recite back during those very liturgical services where the worshipers are to recite things back. Where did that come from?

Communion. This was easy. No, you're not going to touch that before I do and I can find my own mouth. One cup? Too medieval for me and NOT happening. Where's the water fountain?

Three very memorable experiences are these: First, we left a church one Sunday and Lori said "I really love the people, they're great! It's too bad their worship service is so weird." I had to agree. We were a bit disappointed that we couldn't put the two together and make it work. Second, a church on our "short list" had virtually no parking. It was raining and we would have had to park 3 blocks away on a narrow residential street and make a dash for the door. Instead we ended up all dressed up at a Uncle Bobs Family Restaurant eating pancakes and waffles. The last church on the list, and the one we ended up staying at, is located in the city limits neighboring one of the roughest areas of Rochester. I thought it best to do a little "scouting" so we casually, as if we were just lost and turning around, drove through the parking lot as church was letting out one Sunday. We wanted to make sure we fit in. Hmmmmmmmmmmm.

The next Sunday we showed up at what is now Northridge Church and our church home. That was seven years ago. It was the most comfortable, most friendly, and we walked away the first week with a feeling that we mattered. People noticed us, talked to us, and made sure we knew they were happy we found them. On the surface I would evaluate it this way. North wasn't overly stringent and liturgical. Nor was it too loose. It was simply, straight forward, and genuine. There were no odd man-made, or imposing rituals. No bizarre recitations. Just simplicity and a clear, concise message and worship. It all made sense in so many ways. We felt at home and home it has become.

But the bigger story here is how "Church Shopping" happens, the process itself, and what's important to those looking for a home. The answer from the clues is 'Everything". Everything gets evaluated and critiqued. Nothing is off limits in the mind and experience of an outsider coming in for the first time. And the best solution for meeting those expectations is this formula and mindset: "Constant and Never-Ending Improvement." in everything we do. Change is a constant and the only place that "Evolution", so to speak,  has an appropriate place in the Church.

Considering "Old Couches" Part 2

If you've heard David Whiting's message on "Old Couches" and read "Part 1" then you may begin to recognize distinct issues "Old Couches" start to present when Churches adopt them as imperatives.

The 1^st Century Church didn't limp onto the cultural scene. It exploded. Quickly read Acts 2:42 & 47. Can you imagine the excitement at a church that mega-formed into existence when its membership grew by 3,000 in a day? When members were being added daily? Sadly it doesn't often echo the church experienced by many, if any, of us today.

If I seem to be insistent upon the cultural relevance of the Church it's because I am. I took a 20 year hiatus from attending any type of worship service or Church as I pondered the following questions: "If Church is right, if it's such a great place, then how come I don't get it? Why is so seemingly monotonous? Why do we go through the motions and nothing seems to happen?" And "If this is to celebrate the biggest thing in the universe where is everybody?"

In other words . . . "Why is it the same old thing all the time?" . . . More candidly, "Why is it so distant and boring?"

And the answer came back: "Because it often is."

Where The Church struggles is in the accomplishment of its sole, and soul, imperative. And that imperative is how to best implement and execute the Great Commission at any given point in time. Simply stated it's the answer to the age old dilemma of how to best win souls for the sake of Christ and The Kingdom. From time to time we, The Church, have come up with some brilliant ideas. We've risen and met the needs of a culture and made the Gospel accessible and desirable to that day and age. Throughout history Christ body has stepped up and stepped out of its' comfort zone and accomplished amazing works for the glory of God and our Savior. But between those markers we seem to sink into the backdrop of the decades and fade into the gray background of time. We lose touch and, as they say, we become "out of sight and out of mind."

Once again the Americanized version of the Church may be at an imperative crossroads where it will need to step up and catch up to a culture that is changing at lightning speeds or choose to be locked in time and passed by like the 19^th century antiquity it often mimics. While we haven't abandoned the framework of our doctrine and teachings we've neglected our relevance and our attractiveness. We've forgotten to change the faded fabric and our appeal to match the needs and desires of today's culture.

We're often standing at the door offering Kool-Aid to a RedBull culture.  They've grown up and moved on.  MTV and VH1 aren't cutting edge anymore and haven't been for 28 years.  Metaphorically, some Church cultures are just getting cable in a wireless age and yet others are still wrapping tin foil around the rabbit ears. Recognize it, or not, most Church "traditions" lost their relevance and were dragged to the curb decades ago by a culture that has passed us by in search of something more tangible and something they can relate to.  We can sit, arms crossed, on our old couches and we can stand in the doorway defiantly holding back the cultural winds of change while we defend our traditions against ourselves, and strangely enough, often for our own comfort.  Somehow we've adopted an attitude that seemingly equates the antiquity of The Gospel with the acceptable antiquity of our buildings, seating, practices, habits, and list of "must dos".  We've locked horns with the idea of cultural adaptation. And the light, once set upon a hill in a steepled church, is growing dim behind stained glass, marred wood paneling, musty carpeting, millennial aged verbose hymns, and programs that still offer watered down cool aid to a new generation that thirst for The Truth. The "real" truth . . . the truth it can relate to, understand, and grab onto.

The message of Christ has an amazing ability to cross cultures, continents, languages, and generations. It's the Church's duty to ensure that the barriers to Christ are removed. Our obligation is to keep it the things we do, implement, and practice, real and meaningful to a human culture that is easily lured away and swept downstream. Agree with the culture of the day, or not, Christ matters to the culture because the people within that culture matter to Christ.

 

Considering "Old Couches" Part 1

Yesterday's message at Northridge brought a variety of thoughts to mind about Church practices and "Old Couches". 

There's a link to the audio message at the end of this post. But to summarize, an "Old Couch" is a program or practice that a Church may have adopted generations ago that has outlived its' useful purpose. That practice, or program, has become such a tradition that it has procured a nearly sacred status. So much so that it's off limits in terms of getting rid of it despite the fact it does nothing to enhance the spread of The Gospel. In fact, the Old Couch may be not only detrimental to the cause of the Great Commission, but to the welfare of the Church itself. I typically steer clear of commenting on sermons . . . but well, here goes:

A few brief additional thoughts:

Old couches can be "visually unappealing" . . . meaning they don't look "Up To Date"; such as old carpeting, wood paneling, and 1950's bathrooms in a church building. It may convey that a church is staunchly antiquated both visually, and in its' practices. It's out of time and therefore out of touch.

They can be "stained" . . . a church can be burdened with a blemished reputation from careless actions from its' past . . . like abortion protest, Koran burning, internal scandals, etc.  While we are called to have a somewhat radical disposition in our opposition to sin, we are also called to a message that imparts hope through love, not offensiveness.

They can be "broken or dysfunctional" as in having a broken spring, leg, or arm rest . . . like a church that doesn't function biblically as a body, suffers from the lack of leadership or lacks financial support.  Their vision and balance are as askew as their broken parts.

They can be "worn out and uncomfortable" with much of their useful life used up generations ago. The inner material that initially provided a firm base for support and made it inviting to sit in is now broken down, depleted, and tired.  The old couch has outlived its' usefulness . . . it no longer meets the needs of a new generation . . . it doesn't provide the comfort and support that young, needy believers are looking for. Aside from looking old, it feels old, and it doesn't work today . . . but we keep it because we're use to it.  Churches can often fail to recognize the social need to modernize their efforts to effectively relay a timeless message.  They're often caught standing still and locked in time amidst a culture that is hurtling ever, and obliviously, forward.

They can harbor the "smell of the past" . . . like old couches that seem to hang onto the odors of "yester-year".  Churches can be stuck in the glory days of the past. Members and leaders harbor in the safe history of what once was a great congregation. Unfortunately those memories can keep a church blinded from today's needs and challenges.

Then there are the "slip-covers", "cushion flippers", "re-upholsterers", and the old sheets that try to cover up and fool everyone that enters the room.  They mask and costume the old tired ugliness with a glaze of white-wash only to trick a few and disappoint the majority. There is no substitute for "whole hearted" change and Churches that seek a comfortable compromise accomplish just that: a "compromise" at the expense of effectively achieving the eternal life goal of Christ and the Great Commission. We hang on to the past, deny cultural change, and oppose relevance in exchange for our own comfort.

Ridding ourselves of "old couches" often involves a group effort . . . hopefully we become aware that change needs to occur and preferably before it's an emergency that has pushed a Church into dire straits. We make the calls to get friends to help.  We build a consensus and a plan. Someone may hold the door open. Another may remove the cushions to make the burden lighter. Someone else may remove the legs in preparation for a tight doorway squeeze. Then collectively the antiquated article is heaved to the curb. In its' wake the room is open to new ideas, freshness, and a clean design.  

Change, as unwanted as it may initially be, breathes new life into a room and Church.  A new couch means a new pattern that will require new windows dressings to match. We now recognize now that the walls need painting. The complete, new and modern look feels consistent, smells fresh, and meets today's expectations. Interesting enough, within the house as within the Church, the function of a couch hasn't changed.  Its' renewed spirit through modernization has simply made it more inviting and appealing while providing better support and comfort. The critical message is the same and will never change; "Come. Sit, Learn, and Live."

David Whiting's Message "Old Couches"

 

Lost Intentions . . .

In an unexplored recess of our attic is a box that holds my High School yearbooks and in my senior year edition the following is scrawled:

"If we learn by doing then what are we doing here?"

It's not a recent re-discovery. Like the page that holds it, it's been buried in the corner of my mind ever since Dave Aiello scribbled it into permanence.  Dave's indelible inscription echoes sentiments of sarcasm, challenge to authority and norms, the trampling of repetition for the sake of tradition, and some odd sort of wisdom that begs the question: "Am I any closer to 'A' if I am engaged in 'B'?" 

So, "If we learn by doing then what are we doing here?" still echoes through my senses as if to remind me to question my presence and productivity in any given situation. Is this place, this meeting, this activity, this very moment the most productive thing I can be doing right now? Am I getting closer to my goal, farther away, or just treading water?

I often feel that way at Church. "If I learn by doing then what am I doing here?" I become inspired by challenging messages, great gospel oriented ideals and ideas. I become motivated and excited. I'm going to set out and "do something". And much like the 6 years of 'magical' church bulletins that disappear from my possession within minutes of the dismissal prayer; my good intentions too become lost somewhere in the distance between my seat in Church and the car door. What happens to all the brilliance and ambition? Surely Christianity is more than an idea. More than a transcript of the rights and wrongs that I act out. More than a great message that becomes absorbed through my aural canals and seated into my squishy grey matter. Where is "The Doing?"

I have to believe that "The Doing" must be much greater than myself getting "better". Better at not getting angry. Better at shortening the list of bad words that slip out into the air. Better at being nice to "that neighbor". Somehow, somewhere, and some way I have this haunting feeling that all this "betterness" is supposed to be transposed and transmitted to the world at large. At times I feel like a bewildered delivery man . . . standing on a busy downtown corner holding a very important Express Delivery package but I can't find the address . . . I despair and I stare blankly at the neat, tidy, unaddressed parcel. I know the message inside is of utmost importance. Not just to me, but to the world.

And so go my thoughts . . . how do I get all this "learning" into motion and really start "doing". If the world is to be enlightened by Christ through me then why does it seem the brightness of my ambition is sucked into the dark asphalt of the parking lot just beyond the doors of worship?

I've discovered that Christianity is more than a book, more than a good idea, and more than a noun or adjective. Christianity is a verb. It's a "Do" . . . not a "have" or "am". Sure, I "have" Christ. He has me and "Yes, I am". But now . . . What to do?

I don't have an answer and feel a bit amiss . . . full, but hollow.

I pray and ponder . . .

"But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves. For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man who looks intently at his natural face in a mirror. For he looks at himself and goes away and at once forgets what he was like. But the one who looks into the perfect law, the law of liberty, and perseveres, being no hearer who forgets but a doer who acts, he will be blessed in his doing." ~ James 1:22-25

What to do . . . . ?

 

 

Cell Phones – Church – The Promise

My last post "Cell Phones – Christ -The Call", shared my thoughts on what we choose to do and doing it well.

In an interview Martin Cooper, inventor of the cell phone, addresses both his fascination with modern cell phone capabilities, and his dismay at what he calls cellular's "unfulfilled promise." He believes that "promise" was, and is, to simply deliver reliable and accessible wireless phone service. An insightful Cooper founded ArrayComm in 1992 with a sole mission is to simplify wireless communication and free it from an "untethered internet". An internet that, while offering "promise", severely pollutes the purity of cellular service.

So, you're wondering; "What does that have to do with the Church?"

The Gospel, like cell phones, fascinated curious people at it's inception.  Both meet a created need and successfully did so with clever simplicity. And both have become prolifically burdened to the point of near non-function by zealous over-programming. You see, we're so used to fascinating features that we're no longer awed by cellular technology. If anything, we're accepting of mediocrity to the point we openly buy into the fact that half the junk crammed into our phones won't work properly after a few months, and some of it never at all. They become complicated and cumbersome as we "make them better" with more programs to widen their appeal and functionality. In reality we slowly kill them over time.

The life example of Christ, the Church of the Book of Acts, and those nurtured by Paul, not only reached out to the poor; they were, or became the poor. They sold and gave what they had to meet the needs of those without choice in order to relay the message of choice, hope, and promise. They met in homes, ate together, and built value into the lives of each other.  The "haves" and "have-nots" shared equally in the physical and spiritual bounty that was the promise of the Gospel and Church that seamlessly co-existed.

"Religion that is pure and undefiled before God, the Father, is this: to visit orphans and widows in their affliction." James 1:27

While I think James is speaking both literally and metaphorically about the Church meeting the needs of the broken and forgotten parts of society it is also a far cry from some of the bannered and polished programs we create mainly to incubate our own. In most cases, Churches create passive activities that require the lost to find us instead of us reaching out beyond our sanctuaries to find them.

The Gospel is a simple message, a promise given to simple people to pass on to other simple people. Christ didn't come looking for the scholarly, self appointed important people of the day, whom He knew would begin over-programming His message. He sought out, captivated, and captured the hearts and souls of those most often left behind. He implores us to do much the same. Christ lived life out in the open. He sought the ill at heart and they sought him. He nourished their hungers physically and spiritually. Not by plugging people into programs and filling them with mass produced cookies and sugared up water . . . but by meeting their basic needs, nurturing friendships, and fulfilling the promise of life both today and in eternity.

Cooper said this about cell phones; "People want to talk to other people - not a house, or an office, or a car. Given a choice, people will demand the freedom to communicate wherever they are, unfettered by the infamous copper wire." Relate it to The Gospel in this way; People seek out and find Christ in other people – not through attending an over-programmed, over structured, religious system that requires them to immediately conform and plug-in or be damned. Given a choice, the lost would choose to find salvation and freedom through your life, and mine, unfettered by the daunting facades we construct around, and obscure The Gospel with.  

"Just Do It Well"

 

Cell Phones. Christ. The Call.

Rewind. On April 3, 1973 Martin Cooper, inventor of the cell phone, placed the first public cell phone call using Motorola's DynaTac. The DynaTac had but one function; it was just a phone, and went on sale to the public in 1983 for $3,500. I watched a recent interview with Martin as he cascaded through a cell phone trade convention. The now 81 year old inventor was fascinated by the plethora of technology in today's phones; cameras, video, browsers, gps, apps galore, and messaging. But he seemed troubled and vocal about the fact that none of our phones do any one thing particularly well. Some, in fact, are actually horrible "phones". Interesting.

Rewind further. Unlike today's cell phones, Jesus did not come to be all things to all people. He came to call his own. He openly rejected the Pharisees and those who oppressed the poor and broken calling them a "brood of vipers" in Matthew 23. Jesus is, however, all things to His people. He is all we need.

Nor did Jesus come to do everything for everyone. He came as a teacher, often called Rabbi. He came to establish His authority and a pathway home for those who seek Him. He came to die for Life. Jesus did a few things and He accomplished them with simplistic excellence. But, Jesus can do everything for those that call Him "Savior."

Christ came. He lived. He died. He defeated death and in between the example He left was to focus on doing a few things well.

Today it seems we as individuals and as a Church often try to do everything, be everything, and fail miserable at times at accomplishing anything. Being back in Church now for 6 years I went through extremes of first not feeling worthy to do anything. Then being ecstatic to be asked to do "something" and eventually ended up being overwhelmed by "everything". Lately I came to realize I can do a few things well and chose to follow that narrower, tighter path, if you will.

Romans 12:4-8 confirmed the choices I made earlier this year and has encouraged me to seek out what I've been given to "do well" through His grace.

"For as in one body we have many members, and the members do not all have the same function, so we, though many, are one body in Christ, and individually members one of another. Having gifts that differ according to the grace given to us, let us use them: if prophecy, in proportion to our faith;  if service, in our serving; the one who teaches, in his teaching;  the one who exhorts, in his exhortation; the one who contributes, in generosity; the one who leads, with zeal; the one who does acts of mercy, with cheerfulness." Romans 12:4-8

Individually we should seek out the true abilities of our hearts and hands. And as a Church we should identify how we are best suited, situated, and gifted to deliver His message whether that is over the fence, or over-seas. While Nike popularized "Just Do It", I would have to refine and focus that to "Just Do It Well."

Part 2 Follw up post is here:  "Cell Phones - Church - The Promise"