In "Getting to Yes Part 1" I commented that: "What you say is just as important as how you say it." And nothing may be truer than when we are trying to invite our un-churched friends to Church. That in its self maybe part of the problem.
Stop Inviting Friends to Church. What? Did he just say what I think he said? You read it right: Stop inviting friends to church and start asking them to attend "events" and "celebrations". After spending 20 years looking at churches from across the street let me say that a great many if our un-churched friends don't attend Church because they simply don't want to . . . and for variety of reasons.
People are more prone to accept an invitation to attend and "event" . . . such as an Easter or Christmas Celebration. They may be very interested in attending classes like Financial Peace classes or life applicable lessons on raising teens, dealing with marriage, etc . . . anything but "church."
So look at your prayer list from Part 1 and start thinking of better ways to ask. A lot of 'what' you say may be in 'what' you know about your friend.
See if the gate is open by asking: "How are you celebrating Easter this year?"
The answer right now doesn't matter . . . it's "what" we say next.
"Northridge is having a cool 1 hour celebration at 10:00. It's the best if you'd like to come." And if it works add something like, "We can grab a coffee at Starbucks along the way."
A few things just happened, and didn't happen in that sentence. First, we didn't say "church". Second, we put an appealing time limit on it because people may be more willing to accept if they know they won't be held hostage all morning. Third, we invited them to an event. I never mentioned "church", although I did refer to, and I never used "insider" words like "Resurrection Sunday" . . . even that one still "spooks" me a bit.
That's it. Short, simple, and purposeful. No pressure, no "insider" scary words. And no unintentional mixed messages like "you should join us".
Two quick thoughts; First, if they accept make sure you dress as they are . . . nothing is worse than being a visitor and feeling out of place. Second, know that it's really God's work and will and be open enough to gracefully accept "no".
Think about this verse,
Jesus said to them, "But who do you say that I am?" Simon Peter replied, "You are the Christ, the Son of the living God." And Jesus answered him, "Blessed are you, Simon Bar-Jonah! For flesh and blood has not revealed this to you, but my Father who is in heaven. (Matthew 16:15-17 ESV)
While it was Jesus, doing his ministry on this earth, and even though it was himself rubbing shoulders with his disciples daily, he still gave all credit and praise to God the Father for His work in the hearts and minds of men.
Have faith, believe in the work your Father, and just ask. Oh . . . and if you attend Northridge the Easter Celebration times are 8:30, 10:00, and 11:30.
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